Tag Archives: school

Happy new year and positive vibes from here on out

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Happy New Year wonderful readers and I think it’d be stating too much of the obvious to say yet again I’ve been a slight bit absent from this poor neglected site. I did 100% completely underestimate the power of third year, two jobs, a social life and a relationship. But the positive aspect is that it’s manageable and I’m coping in a spectacular fashion, even if I do say so myself.

So hopefully we all saw in the New Year full of festive cheer, surrounded by those we love, having a grand old merry time. Personally, me and the significant other went to visit my family who were up from the South and we booked a hotel room close to where I live. I wanted to get royally bladdered in fantastic fashion but instead found myself with tummy ache watching Adam Lambert and Queen bring in the New Year. Which wasn’t all so bad.

This year marks some incredibly momentous moments, I will complete two shows, one written from scratch, two more essays, a written script, I will graduate, leave two jobs and hopefully gain a career, buy a house, visit Florida, buy a pair of cats and hopefully have a moment to relax at some point. And I must tell you the great news that I am now an officially legal driver! Yes, I passed the test and got there eventually, I must say learning to drive and only having a lesson maybe twice a month has been one of the most difficult experiences of my life but it was completely worth it, so very soon I’ll be uploading photos of my adventures in my very own brum.

Anyway, the new year for me is about new experiences, it’s about doing what I wish I did last year, doing what I always wish I’d already done and what ultimately I want to do. None of this new year new me boohockey. I’ve had my battles and my struggles especially with the likes of depression, anxiety and stress but it’s not something I particularly feel I need to talk about. 2014 challenged that, told me I was an unacceptable human if I didn’t carry a doctors note at all times to prove my problems, that everything else is a main priority and my health was second. I treat myself with this same discipline and for a long time made myself incredibly unhappy to a point where no amount of James Blunt and Man Vs Food marathons could fix me and sadly nothing else either. So I gave it all up, I stepped back from the things that hurt me, accepted that ultimately I didn’t give a fuck what narrow minded individuals wanted to project onto. And my word, it felt incredible, absolutely fucking terrifying but for the rest of time, I promise, it was one of the best feelings to experience. A sense of freedom and independence. That’s what I want 2015 to be, a year where selfishly I take risks and say how I feel and do what i need to do to be where I know I’ll be happiest.

It’s not something I’d generally preach about, I don’t believe in any of this “New Year, New Me” horseradish and it’s in that that I figured a year doesn’t change you, you change the year. 2014 did nothing to me, the events I led myself to did however. I should have put my foot down with things to begin with, I should have spoken up and I should have been more spontaneous in that sense. We may only be 12 days in, but already I’m committing to do the things I’ve always wanted to, I got my driving license, I’m taking time to write, eating healthy and taking care of myself.

At the moment I’m stuck in a week of intensive rehearsal and technical figuration with our physical performance of Cinderella. I’ve got the ambitious role of director, gained the role of sound guy and music wiz and am configuring how everything is going to work overall, ready for the three performances next week. I’m going to do a little dedicated post to the show after we wrap on Saturday, show some photos, video and fantastic artwork courtesy of one of the loveliest friends. It’s going well, just the tweaks and final touches and hopefully we will have a beautiful piece of theatre.

What’s next for this blog, should you stick around? Well i haven’t been particularly interesting for the best part of last year but I’m going to do everything I can to find talking points and to just generally check in with you all. I’m half way through a Bootea teatox at the moment so I’ll post a review of that as a lot of people are interested in the whole january detoxing thing and whether it’s worth doing or not. I have a couple of Lush and product hauls, the blogging university to keep up with, general reviews and creative endeavours to badger on about too. So if you find yourself bored and wanting something to read while you awkwardly avoid having to make conversation with that person you just noticed from your class sat opposite you on the train, then here I am. Or just if you’re a little lost.

Keep happy and positive

Demi Nicole

x x x

365 Days To Go

MONSTERS UNIVERSITYDealing with my lack of productivity…


 

A tale as old as time, I want to do so much but can’t find the motivation to do any of it. What a dilemma!

Okay! Today it hit me that in a years time I will not be a university student, I won’t be in education and overall, in my mind, I won’t have a purpose. Insert existential crisis right about here. Now, I see people cry out that the end of a significant era can cause panic, uncertainty and a complete lack of stability in every day life and I have always found myself commenting to fellow classmates “what next? What are we supposed to do after this?”. It was a panic that was brushed off with the easy “we will think about that when we get there” and the royal “we” kind of left me comforted that I won’t be alone in the terrifying journey of professional adulthood.

All in all, I’m not alone, around 2 million people graduate every year and some how figure out how to jump the broken bridge of life from education to well…whatever comes after. This should be comforting, it should make me think “if all those people manage it, then I’ll manage too and I’ll get by just fine”. But it seems all of those other students know where they want to go next, like they were handed some magical next step map to Mordor or some scholarship to Hogwarts and everything from that point is just dandy. And I guess I slept in the day all the secret answers and cheat codes were finally unveiled.

Now of course, I’m kidding myself. No matter how much I romanticise it, there is no hidden level where you 1up so much in life you will no longer need to worry but I think that was my way of avoiding the 21 year question: So, what do you want to be when you get older?

I just figured, I’ll think about that when I get older, I don’t need to worry now. Well guess what? I AM OLDER. I AM THERE. And am I prepared? Am I hickory. I’m the one sat here on a Friday evening watching Nintendo conferences and eating bacon rather than actually reading the Great Wall of China long list of reading I need to do.  I see people that are just so productive with their time it’s unreal, they create and design and take a million selfies a day, (even that seems more productive than my current state) everyone seems to have it figured out. Don’t get me wrong, I work, I clean, I cook etc but I have a creative mind that seems to have been trapped in a forgotten dungeon for the past 4 months and I can’t remember what I did with the key.

The end of 2nd year went out on such a high, I achieved an astoundingly amazing grade for my directed adaptation of “Lovesong” by Abi Morgan and Frantic Assembly and I felt incredibly positive about what I could personally achieve. Then summer happened. I guess summer has been the complete polar opposite of what summer should be and to some degree it has destroyed me to within an inch of my own sanity. There are a lot of nasty people I am pretty much rid of though for it and I have met some friends I know I’ll have for a long time.

But I need to figure it out and WO-MAN up. I want to get fit, I want to be creative and do something worth doing. I have a driving test in a month, I have new places of work to prove my abilities and I have a degree to finish – which ultimately is my most important priority. So yeah, 365 days. I wonder if on the 12th September 2015 I’ll feel like I’ve done everything I can to kickstart my life.  Maybe I’ll figure out how to stop panicking and start acting on my goals. It’s easy right?

There must be a way to focus thy mind, a way to be not so distracted by kitty cats and endless episodes of The Office US on Netflix.

Let me know if you struggled with the “after uni blues” or a difficult transition in life? What helps you motivate yourself? Is procrastination an epidemic?

See you tomorrow

Demi Nicole

x x x